Beware Of The Blob! Part Two

When we last left our tale-just look at the last post, it's right below this. I know it's rough but be brave. 

"I know you X-Men readers aren't very familiar with originality as the Doom Patrol fans like to say-both of them!"

Spider-Man never made much of an impact on pop culture since they killed off in like the 60's. Remember that? Also I'd swap places with him. 

I should totally deface Marvel wiki and put this as Multiple Man's first appearance.

They got Cyclops, by removing the one thing that stops him from killing you all! Okay!!! And really Angel getting caught is now surprise. Flight is like one of the things every other superhero gets to do. And they caught Beast by having some guy hold him him between his legs.


 And they caught Beast by having some guy hold him him between his legs.

There is only one way that can work and they are not  nice young ladies and this is certainly not the privacy of his own bedroom

"You're as helpless as I think!"

I'm running out of funny things to say. I've already exhausted non funny things long before. Please let me die. And yes use fire to trap the kid with ice powers. That makes sense.

"Our speech balloons are yellow, only Deadpool could do this!"

I would not be surprised if Jean Grey forgot she could do these things. And wouldn't knives have been useful to the carnival people? For like stabbing X-People? Just saying. And Blob, can take direct gunshots, but can't break ice. Even normal people can break ice!

The captions are on holiday, two posts for this thing and you'd need one as well.

Oh plaster that's way to tough for him to tear a hole in. And for a non conformist Beast you sure picked a strict cult. Also really Blob, you can't climb out of that? Actually never mind it makes this story shorter. 

Well that was short. Oh and Blob's thought balloon may be the saddest thing ever. 

I imagined Cyclops' eye beams on super low power would feel rather nice. Like sticking your hands near the jets in a jacuzzi but all over! And Professor Xavier gave speeches like that to all the parents of X-Men recruits. I kid I kid, he only gave it to Hank's parents... and everyone else he ever knew. 

I am not joking. 

And if his honour matched his power? Fuck you narrator, fuck you for every pound that makes up the Blob. 


This is one of the worst comics I've ever read. Arrogance permeates the story, the heroes aren't in the right because they do good things, but simply because they're the main characters. And Blob's origin is utterly morally bankrupt and I have no idea what Stan Lee and Jack Kirby were thinking. 


2013 is the 50th anniversary of the X-Men, who as you probably wouldn't have guessed from these posts are my favourite superhero team. Over the last fifty years the team has expanded, diversified and told many a interesting and wonderful story. 


And generally tried to be as unlike this early outing as humanly possible. 

Beware Of The Blob! Part One

In order to understand how X-Men came to be, we must look at Doom Patrol the Fantastic Four. The Fantastic Four was almost certainly following the coat tails of the Justice League, DC's successful team book of the time. The publisher of Marvel Comics, Martin Goodman asked Stan Lee to come up with a  team for the company .


The result was a bit different from most previous comic book teams. One way was that the Fantastic Four wasn't composed of pre-existing characters, but ones who shared a origin and were indeed an extended family. Very soon into their run they would also shed secret identities, and after a few adventures in "Central City" (presumably located in the East Cost State), they were firmly situated in a real life city, New York.

But more importantly they had genuine conflict among the heroes. Weird Silver Age shaded melodramatic conflict but still conflict. This helped it become a runaway hit who's influence is still felt by nearly every comic without wooden logs for main characters.


Obviously Marvel wanted to keep warming itself on the flames of the team book craze they helped kindle, so they churned out another book in "The Sensational Fantastic Four Style" (hey I didn't come up with that tagline), The X-Men. And they were like the Fantastic Four, except there was five of them, and they weren't related, and at the start they were kind of weird and creepy.

So yeah the X-Men started as a cash in. Stan Lee apparently decided  that coming up with individual origins was getting boring, so he had the five X-Men, Cyclops, Beast, Angel, Iceman and Marvel Girl (Jean Grey if you don't know her old codename) be part of a emerging race of mutants. Who are of course persecuted because normal people are dicks with no sense of self preservation.


From X-Men issue 3, Beware The Blob

The 60's predecessor to Weight Watchers could be a little zealous

Peculiarly Angel appears to have gained some kind of omnipresence power, for he is not only tea bagging the Blob but also flying above the logo. Also X-Men covers had a habit of claiming  something within was the strangest thing ever, for example the X-Men were the strangest superheroes ever. And while Blob is a little strange he pails next to the guy with the power to spit out a space ship, or the equally bald Charles Xavier clone with boobs. 

Also that X-Men taking America by storm thing is an overstatement... if saying Wolverine doesn't appear in a lot of comics is also one. Yeah X-Men during the 60's was never a very popular book, mainly being seen as the Fantastic Four But Less So. In fact for a while it only existed as a reprint title. X-Men probably owes it's more recognizable elements and it's popularity to Chris Claremont and John Byrne. But that's another story. 

Also look at Iceman in the corner logo trying to actually be seen, maybe he got sidelined as punishment for only throwing what appears to be a slightly dirty toy rocket at the Blob. 

Also soon we shall see why the Blob is such a threat, and it will shock you true believers!


There's a fairly boring add for a wrist radio, which would be great if you were attending a Dick Tracy costume competition. But we're skipping it.